GREAT EXPECTATIONS

SECTION B   
What do you think before your results comes in? What is the only thing that you want during that point of time? What is your brain telling you so that you don’t collapse and fall on the floor?
It all comes down to expectations. It is an overwhelming feeling. Before every single important moment, your mind keeps telling you that it’s better to let all the negative thoughts go, it keeps telling you that the odds, no matter what, will be in your favor and that you that you will achieve success and that whatever that is going to happen will make you reach the greatest greats.  
What is expectation?????????? It’s a feeling that turns your mere thoughts into the strongest of beliefs making you feel confident and happy even during the loneliest of your moments. It gives you hope and makes you believe that no matter what happens you will ultimately reach your goal. Expectations are good but, only in certain circumstances.
E.g.1)  whenever your parents used to go out when you were a little kid, you used to expect that they would bring you candies and chocolates. But what would happen if they didn't??? You would be really disappointed, angry and cranky and this phase would last for at least a day or two. The question is: What would've happened if you wouldn't have expected in the first place? The answer is quite simple. Had you not expected that your parents would bring you chocolates, it would've saved you a day or two of sitting in utter distress. That way, even if they didn't bring anything, you wouldn't have been affected! And if they did, well, that would be a much bigger source of joy. In the above case, Expectation turned out to be a kill joy.

E.g.2) what do all those “SAAS-BAHU” serials show? The fighting and the shouting is for what reason? Yes! You guessed it right…………… again Expectation. Both of them want a suitable living scenario with each other. The “BAHU” wants the “SAAS” to be good to her, respect her as an equal family member and love her like the daughter she never had (not to mention some personal space). The “SAAS” wants the “BAHU” to be helping, considerate………………. oh! Who am I kidding? Basically submissive and ready to take orders as and when required. Since both the parties disagree to do so, it results in the biggest, baddest and the most repetitive clashes one might have ever seen. The main point is, had both the parties not categorized their needs and wants, this situation of constant slapping and falling and tugging and crying (u get the idea) would not have taken place. The family could’ve lived happily and peacefully. Unfortunately, TRP is a bitch.  


But you know what? expectations are not that bad. it’s just that the situation has to be right. a good student can expect good marks, because she has worked hard and can afford to gain some confidence. but for a below average student, expectation is detrimental. In his case, there is no point of gaining confidence if he has not worked hard at all.

“If men could see us as we really are, they would be a little amazed; but the cleverest, the acutest men are often under an illusion about women: they do not read them in a true light: they misapprehend them, both for good and evil: their good woman is a queer thing, half doll, half angel; their bad woman almost always a fiend.” 
― Charlotte Brontë, Shirley

A Spontaneous Overflow Of Powerful Emotions.

Hi guys….. It’s my first shot at a blog………hope all of you enjoy it.

What are emotions? Feelings that you convey to others through one medium or another or keep buried within yourself. Don’t worry, the following write up is not going to be as complex as the heading sounds. The following ground rules simplified with examples can help you avoid being uncomfortable around others and vice-versa.

PART- A {never quit on anything or anybody}

As simple as this seems, many of us don’t practice what we preach. Giving up, these days, is as common as E.bola. Many of us don’t realize that if one door shuts down on us one more always opens, we just have to take up that opportunity and make the most of it. No matter how hard the situation might be, if the job needs to be done, it’s more like a Sophie’s choice. Quitting on something is very different from quitting on someone. The following examples will help you to decipher exactly this:-

·         Quitting on something :

EXAMPLE 1 – The other day, my dad got some food from outside. The delivery man came really late and we were almost famished. The order came, and, like any other delivery, the food was inside a plastic bag bound by a god-awful double knot. I don’t even know how they do it but look at it through the eyes of a hungry group of people; you’ll see that that knot is a big hindrance to the paradise that’s inside the bag. So, at once my brother decided to open it up. And as usual as human behavior, he gave it up after exactly 5 seconds and tore the packet open. As a result, half the contents fell to the ground and all us went to bed partially hunger stricken.

OBSERVATION: - had my brother taken the help of a pair of scissors [* one-more-door-opens*theory comes into my mind] to cut open the packet, we could have had our food with the full delight and contentment that one gets when they eat butter naan with dal makhani and not got to sleep hungry and wanting more.

I guess what I am trying to convey is the faster you quit, the worse will be the consequences that you will have to face at one point or another.

EXAMPLE 2: - What do we exactly do in class XI? What according to everyone, is the first priority as soon as they set foot into the senior wing? Yes, it’s the ghastly “deciding-your-stream phase”. At this point of time, many students are decided as to what they will take; minds made up…. all excited to start the new session [though inky kuchh mahino mein phategi]. But this is just true for the 15% of the total school population because the rest of the 85% per cent of the students are still in a daze. They still haven’t come out of their 2 months holiday after class X phase. So hyped up are they that [and seriously someone actually said this to me] they wished they could fail Xth so that they could just to come back to these 2 months and party like there’s no tomorrow {or in this case, no future}.

After a week or two of deciding what we want, the school decides what we “DESERVE”. That’s of course on the basis of how much GPA we get in our Xth. I’m sorry I’m not here to give you all a lecture on how CCE works…… but it’s my job to give you a pretext otherwise you won’t understand what I’m trying to say, and you’ll end up not being able to pay any heed to this and eventually,  give up on the write – up . I just don’t want that, is all.

a) Giving up for bad – a student took PCB with say, Phys. Ed. he decided not to take Maths as he was never really good at it. Now, what he doesn't understand is that physics and chemistry contains a good amount of Maths that he has to do, anyway. I’m not saying it was stupid of him to not take Maths [because PCB with Maths is a very tough combination….. though ideal…. but tough], what I'm saying is that it was stupid of him to not try and understand Maths during his junior years. Had he not given up on Maths completely, he could have done better in physics and chemistry and avoid being amongst the bottom three of the class. What I’m trying to say is that try and understand what you are doing and give all that you have to achieve all that you want.

b) Giving up for good- a student took Humanities, she got GPA 10 in class Xth she was very good in Maths but she decided to take Humanities. It’s not like she gave up on Maths, she decided that for her career she simply didn't  need Maths or Science and that she wanted to pay more attention on English, sociology, political science, etc. if you look at it from one way it’s not even giving up. She tried as much as she could during her junior years and got above 90% in Maths!!That’s not giving up, that’s called being a winner. She has nothing to be guilty about, and unlike the above mentioned student, she’s got no worries, no problems and can start her senior year with the pride and happiness she deserves. Therefore,

·         Quitting on someone : -

EXAMPLE 1: - Say you have been friends with a person since about 10 years. Being childhood friends, you guys are very close to each other. All of a sudden, he becomes adrift from you, starts getting irritated at the smallest things. Slowly and slowly he just shuts down all contact and just becomes isolated. You try to find out what’s going on and you finally decide to meet his parents, his other friends and his siblings. But none of them have any clue as to what is going on. You see him tip toe out of his house in the middle of the night one day and decide to follow him. To your surprise he enters into one of his friends’ house. You secretly try to peep in and get the shock of your life. Your best friend, just 17 was caught by you while he was doing drugs. What do you do? Do you run away and decide never to contact him henceforth? What do you do? Do you inform his family and tell them to take appropriate steps? Do you decide to beat the living daylights out of him and his friends and hand them over to the police? Or do you wait for him to OD and eventually die?

You can’t run away, you have to help him. As his best friend you have to show him the way before he does some serious damage to himself. To save him from the shame that will come upon him, you have to pull him out of the darkness and let him know that you are there for him no matter what the situation might be. At this point of time, beating him up or shouting at him; it will make him much more sensitive and confused than he already is. Sorting out the problem through simple, nonviolent conversations will help him a ton because he’s still at that phase where he hasn’t fully overdosed himself, though he’s vulnerable to it.

EXAMPLE 2: - let’s say that a girl starts liking this guy in her class. She’s really conservative of her feelings and keeps them bottled up within herself. Days pass by and it’s almost the end of the year and she’s still in complete ‘awe’ of him. She decides that she should go and convey her feelings to him. Being really shy, she told her friend to tell him. That guy, after knowing all about this messaged her promising that he would talk to her. The next day, the girl goes to the class expecting to hear from him. The guy comes into the class, he ignores her and doesn't even come near that row in which she’s sitting. She keeps thinking that he’s actually not talking because he might be just as shy as she is. She comes home sad, disappointed, and cranky. She doesn't feel like eating anything and immediately goes to bed. The next day, she decides not to go to school. That evening, her friend calls up and tells her that he told everyone about this and made a laughing stock out of her. He also said that he would never talk to her. Unable to believe her friend, she opens up her account and realizes that he had blocked her from all the social sites through which they were connected.  Now, imagine that you’re in her position and try to answer this question: -

How could the situation be handled differently?

Instead of being so ruthless about it, he could have talked it out with the girl. The girl instead of hiding her feelings, felt she owed him the truth. He should have respected her feelings and should have told her how he really felt [even if it was probably nothing] and should have told her the reasons as to why he can’t like her or be with her.

What I’m trying to say is that, giving up on someone not only hurts them, it hurts you too. At some point in your life you might repent what you did and how much it would have hurt the other person. Whether it’s your family or your friends, they desperately need your support and trust in every way possible. Giving up on a loved one would not be the best way to go. It’s a fact that people like these tend to remain isolated, unhappy and guilt conscious for the rest of their lives. Always remember…. “What goes around comes all the way back around”.